Sorry

sorry that i cried..sorry that i was so stupid and stubborn...sorry that i took u for granted...sorry for not respecting you..sorry for being ignorant...sorry that i keep saying things that upsets u...sorry that i keep bringing back the past...sorry that u have to see me like this...sorry for everything...sorry that i couldnt promise u that i wouldnt cry and be upset for u...sorry that i couldnt let u go...sorry that although i understand why are we going thru this..but still reluctant to get it into my system...

i'm sorry...

you know me well...u know what i wanted to drink this afternoon..and u ordered for me without me knowing...i'm touched...tears came pouring down..coz i know i'm gonna miss everything bout you, with you...everything that we do and share...when i saw u break down...i know that i needed to protect u from all those...i tried to comfort you..but ur like pushing me away...i dunno whatelse to say anymore..except to pray hard everyday for you...hoping that the angel inside of u will come out and save you...although we're special friends...but this is not what i want..bi u know me...this is not what i wanted...u know me well..i no longer can hold ur hands, no longer kiss you or ask u to spare all ur time for me...coz u said those will only make things harder for the both of us...

i regretted so much...of what i didnt do when i had to chance...i owed u so much...play piano for u, sing a song to you...so many things..now..no matter how much i wants to do it...to make it up to you...it just no point anymore..coz to u..it doesnt matter anything at all...it kills my heart..slicing thru again and again...

just now as i was on my way back..i suddenly remembered that u made me this LOVE NOTE for our anniversary..is a present from u..and in it there was this one page saying that u would take me back with no reasons needed...so i quickly went to look for it...lil do i know..that its only valid when its possible...i was so naive...although now i couldnt use it..but i hope...one day in future..i can use it...

i'm just stubborn..in loving you...i'll wait for u...hope that u can love urself more...


p.s.: u r my bi, and forever my bi...